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Dear Pip: How does one move through a dance club while avoiding the risk of engaging in physical combat?

The proper way involves a technique known in the industry as the “suspended hand-chop.” The walking-through-nightclubs industry, that is.

The suspended hand chop involves holding one’s forearm parallel to the torso, with your hand directly in front of your right eye (southpaws may reverse this). The hand itself has the first two fingers extended fully, and the other two lightly sinking towards the floor (this avoids the impression that you are waving at somebody). Relax your fingers so that you’re not accidentally mistaken for somebody who knows wing-chun.